I have come to the conclusion that small talk may have not been interesting to me for its own sake. I really don’t care to talk about the weather or how delicious food is. However, small talk can be a great tool to build relationships in all aspects of life. People can get better at small talk with some thought and practice.
Think of small talk as the road to a deeper conversation introverts enjoy, and know that it’s OK to talk about the weather or food if you don’t have anything else to say, even if it’s not something you are interested in. It’s also helpful to have a few conversational questions ready that you thought of ahead of time, if you’ll be in a situation of meeting new people and working a room is not your strong point. Try to think of open ended questions – not just those that can be answered with “yes” or “no” or “good” or “fine” to give the other person the opportunity to speak about herself instead of having the conversation fall all on you. Just remember that pauses in conversations are okay and normal, so do not put too much pressure on yourself.
David Hall, M.Ed. is a speaker, author, and host of the Quiet and Strong Podcast, where he interviews thought leaders, creatives, and professionals who help introverts thrive. With over 25 years in higher education, David has led workshops, trainings, and presentations on productivity, personality, and introversion. His mission is to help introverts honor their needs, understand their strengths, and succeed on their own terms. He is the author of Minding Your Time: Time Management, Productivity, and Success, Especially for Introverts and a passionate advocate for creating work environments where introverts can do their best work.
