A conversation (Ep 135) with David Hall, Inteviewed by his wife, exploring the topic of embracing introversion.

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Show Notes

Are you an introvert searching for ways to embrace your unique strengths and navigate the world as a quiet and strong individual? 

In this episode of The Quiet And Strong Podcast, we flip the script as David’s wife Cari takes over the mic and we take a deep dive into the fascinating world of introversion in a one-of-a-kind interview with David.  Join Cari as she engages in a thought-provoking conversation with David as they discuss strategies for helping introverts discover their strengths and honor their needs.

In this enlightening episode, you will learn:

– The importance of understanding and accepting your introversion

– How to utilize your strengths as an introvert while building effective relationships

– Strategies for managing time and increasing productivity as an introvert

Through David’s personal experiences and expertise, you will gain invaluable insights into the world of introversion, dispel common misconceptions, and gain the tools needed to thrive as an introvert in an extroverted world.

Don’t miss out on this empowering and enlightening episode that celebrates and embraces the strengths of introverts. Whether you’re an introvert seeking guidance or an extrovert looking to better understand the introverts in your life, this episode is for you.
 

Tune in now and join us on this journey of self-discovery and growth on The Quiet And Strong Podcast, and Be Strong.

– – –
 
Books mentioned in this episode:

“Getting Things Done” by David Allen

Marty Olsen Laney’s books on introversion:
The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World
The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World

– – –

Contact the Host of the Quiet and Strong Podcast:

David Hall

Author, Speaker, Educator, Podcaster

quietandstrong.com
Gobio.link/quietandstrong
david [at] quietandstrong.com

Take the FREE Personality Assessment:

Typefinder Personality Assessment

Follow David on your favorite social platform:

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Get David’s book:
Minding Your Time: Time Management, Productivity, and Success, Especially for Introverts

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Quiet & Strong Merchandise


If you’re struggling with introversion, here are some things you can do now:

After listening to this episode, here are three actions you can take immediately to embrace your introversion and honor your needs:

1. Reflect on Your Introversion: Take some time to reflect on your own introversion. Consider how being introverted has shaped your experiences, strengths, and needs. Reflect on any challenges you may have faced and how understanding your introversion can help you navigate them.

2. Identify Your Unique Gifts and Strengths: Explore the unique gifts and strengths that come with being an introvert. Consider your ability to think deeply, listen attentively, and empathize with others. Recognize the value you bring to relationships, work, and any other areas of your life.

3. Nourish Your Introverted Self: Develop strategies to honor your introverted needs. This can include setting aside alone time to recharge, creating a quiet and peaceful environment for yourself, and practicing self-care activities that align with your introversion, such as journaling, reading, or enjoying nature.

4. Seek Resources on Introversion: Dive deeper into the topic of introversion by exploring books, podcasts, and websites dedicated to understanding and celebrating introverts. Look for resources that resonate with you and provide further insights and strategies for embracing your introversion.

5. Share Your Understanding: Engage in conversations with friends, family, or colleagues to share what you’ve learned about introversion and your own experiences. Help create awareness and understanding by sharing the strengths and needs of introverts and promoting a more inclusive and supportive environment for introverted individuals.


Key takeaways from this episode

– Introverts have specific needs that are not always addressed in general time management books, which inspired the speaker to write their first book on time management for introverts.

– Recognizing and utilizing the strengths of both introverts and extroverts can lead to greater productivity and collaboration.

– Understanding and accepting one’s introversion is key to overcoming shyness and social anxiety.- Introverts can be highly sensitive, but not all introverts are highly sensitive.

– Understanding different personality types, such as thinking and feeling types, can help improve relationships and communication.

– Nurturing and supporting a child’s gifts and strengths, even if they align with introversion, is important for their well-adjustment.

– Labels like “ambivert” should not be relied upon; understanding one’s own strengths, needs, and strategies for success is more important.

– The podcast aims to help introverts embrace their strengths and honor their needs, rather than fixing them.

– The guest on this episode, David Hall, is an author, blogger, and podcaster who provides insight and strategies to improve communication and careers for introverts.

Timestamped Overview

[00:00:09] Welcome to the Quiet And Strong podcast, episode 135, with introvert expert David Hall.

[00:04:35] Getting a psychology degree led to a job in higher education, where the author discovered their introversion and strengths. A compliment about their thoughtful speech inspired the creation of a website and podcast.

[00:09:38] People can like others and be introverts, contrary to the myth that extroverts are the only ones who enjoy socializing and being around people. The main difference between introverts and extroverts lies in how they recharge their energy: introverts need alone time after socializing, while extroverts gain energy from social interactions.

[00:10:41] Introversion is about returning inward, but it’s more than just taking a break from people. It involves creativity, imagination, and the need for strategic thinking. Introverts also enjoy collaborating and being with people, and they are not necessarily drained by social interactions.

[00:16:39] The text mentions asking about introverted superpowers and who would play David in a movie.

[00:19:44] Introversion is often misunderstood as shyness, social anxiety, highly sensitive, and socially awkward.

[00:21:10] Introverts and highly sensitive individuals have unique strengths and needs; shyness can be overcome.

[00:24:01] Overcoming shyness, social anxiety, and social awkwardness by understanding introversion. Preparing and thinking before speaking is important in social situations. Therapists should understand introversion. Awkward moments are normal.

[00:27:40] The term “ambivert” describes someone who is both introverted and extroverted, but the label itself is not as important as understanding one’s strengths and needs. Self-reflection and learning from others can help in figuring out who you are.

[00:30:50] It’s important to understand and respect individual needs and strengths. Some require time alone for deep thinking, while others are more creative or skillful in different areas.

[00:36:33] The person is not a good cook and admires someone named Marcus Buckingham who emphasizes focusing on outcomes rather than the process.

[00:40:15] The text discusses the importance of considering details, emotions, and personal preferences in relationships. It emphasizes the value of embracing differences and finding balance.

[00:43:29] Having siblings or multiple children highlights the uniqueness of each individual and their inherent gifts, helping parents to support and guide them accordingly. Understanding introversion is important for better parenting and fostering well-adjusted children.

[00:46:01] The person reflects on their introverted nature, their need for alone time, and the lack of understanding from their parents. They mention the importance of having their voice heard and recommend books on introversion.

[00:49:12] The author’s photographer, editor, and co-business owner inspired them to write a book about introversion and time management.

[00:51:50] Friends discover understanding and appreciate each other’s introverted nature.


Transcript

Cari Hall [00:00:09]:

Hello, and welcome to episode 135 of the Quiet And Strong podcast, especially for introverts. I’m your host, Cari Hall, and the marketing genius behind quiet and strong. This is a weekly podcast dedicated to understanding the strengths and needs of introverts. Interversion is not something to fix, but to be embraced. Normally, we’ll air each episode on Monday. Be sure to subscribe your favorite platform, leave a review. That would mean a lot to David. Tell a friend about the podcast. Help get the word out there. That introversion is a beautiful thing. Today, I have a very special guest. You know him as the voice behind quiet and strong, and I know him as my husband, David. David Hall is an author, blogger, podcaster, and speaker on a mission to help introverts, discover their strengths, and honor their needs. David has a masters in counseling and has spent over 20 years working in higher education and has given many workshops, trainings, and presentations on personality strengths, and introversion and extroversion. His book, minding your time, time management, productivity, and success, especially for introverts, helps readers understand themselves and their introversion to be more successful in managing their time and productivity. Through his podcast, David shares some valuable insight tips and strategies for introverts to improve their communication, confidence, and careers with his passion for supporting introverts David aims to change the perception that introversion is a weakness by highlighting the unique strengths and valuable contributions introverts bring to the table. Welcome to the show, David. It’s so great to have you sitting on the other side of the mic today.

David Hall [00:01:44]:

Oh, well, thanks, Cari. It’s interesting to be sitting on the other side of/Users/tcsdesigngroup/Downloads/Q_S_Podcast_Ep_135.txt the mic. We’ll see how your great idea goes here, but, it’s as Cari said in the intro, she is the marketing genius behind the client strong podcast. She has many years in marketing, She’s a commercial photographer that specializes in branding, and we’ll have to have you on and talk about that a little bit more about camera confidence

Cari Hall [00:02:06]:

think you were not sharing how many those many, many years are.

David Hall [00:02:10]:

Right. Right. Right. So I I joked that I have a true in house agency. So Cari does some of the editing. So, you know, I’ll have to watch what I say. Or if I say something wrong, she she has the power to take it out. Also, our son, Sam, is a brilliant editor, and he often is the editor as well. So

Cari Hall [00:02:26]:

David Hall [00:02:26]:

He’s the best one. Let’s let’s see how this goes.

Cari Hall [00:02:31]:

Alright. Well, I’m gonna take it over from here. So, David, you have your guests on, and we you have some kind of standard questions and some kind of custom questions. So we’re gonna start with your standard question that you ask everybody. Tell us about your journey. How did you discover your own introversion and how did you end up as an introvert that’s a podcast host?

David Hall [00:02:51]:

Okay. And you’ve been on much of this journey with me. So we’ve been married a long time, and will be coming

Cari Hall [00:02:57]:

up on 30 years. Do you know that?

David Hall [00:02:59]:

Yeah. I don’t know if I was gonna say that, but, yeah. So and we’re still very happy. You know, just growing up. A lot of my guests or a lot of people I speak with will say, I thought something was wrong with me. And I always wanna clarify that too that not all introverts feel that way. And we’ll probably get into a little bit more that you’ve been a helpful part of my journey because you didn’t feel like something was wrong with you. You’re definitely an introvert, but you’ve always been confident. And that’s been helpful for me to see. but I was one of the ones that felt like something was wrong. And, you know, why can’t I be more outgoing like that person? I see And I was just studying, like, what makes people successful? And so I got a degree in psychology. That’s actually where we met. We were in college. We had a job that was supporting us through college together, and we had a great group of friends. We’d hang out after work and slowly, maybe we would hang out the longest, or we started probably just getting together on our own, and it it’s been great ever since. And I think that’s part of the introversion too. I think we’re both probably a little hard to get to know.

Cari Hall [00:04:06]:

Yeah. Definitely took us a little longer to get to know each other than a lot of people who are already getting together as, you know, as couples.

David Hall [00:04:13]:

Yeah. And I think that’s common with introverts. You have to work alongside somebody or do something together, and and it takes some time to get to know us sometimes. I think that’s very common for introverts.

Cari Hall [00:04:26]:

and also it doesn’t feel like we have a better friendship and a better understanding of one another because we took the time.

David Hall [00:04:31]:

Oh, absolutely.

Cari Hall [00:04:32]:

It’s dived into a head 1st 9 days later. We’re getting married.

David Hall [00:04:35]:

Yeah. Yeah. No. It wasn’t like that. Getting a bachelor’s in psychology was definitely a starting point for this journey. I got a master’s in counseling. I’m still on the journey. You know, still studying a lot about personality and personality differences, and it’s all leading somewhere. And with that, I got a job in higher education. And I think that’s where it really started to click. I trained in the Myers Briggs, and I was a facilitator for that. And if people don’t know, it’s a personality assessment. It does talk about introversion. It does talk about a few other things. And one of the things the facilitator said was Introverts, think, and then speak, and extrovert speak in order to think. And that was, like, one of my light bulb moments. I’m like, wow. That is how it works for me, and that is a difference. About the same time, Our organization also did it was called strengths quest back then. It’s now called CliftonStrengths. It’s from the Gallup organization. And it’s not about introversion and extroversion, but it does talk about naturally occurring strengths. And the combination of those 2 really cemented. You’re an introvert. Great strengths come from it. It’s very natural. You didn’t choose it, but you sure can choose to embrace it. While I was doing the strengths quest, I was getting some advanced training because I ended up being a trainer for probably about 500 people for the organization, you know, doing workshops and things. And while I was doing that, I went to a 3 day kind of advanced workshop workshop where you have presentations, but then some good small discussions around your tables, some self reflection. So we did, like, 3 days of that, and I thought I was participating plenty. And, you know, I’ve kinda learned it’s all relative. Like, I’m talking more than I usually had in the past, but still maybe not as much as my extroverted friend that’s sitting next to me. And afterward, the facilitator pulled me aside in Canon, but I talked plenty and all that good stuff. And she said, And this was a compliment. I learned to take it that way. You’re quiet and strong. And when you talk, people listen. And that’s where all of this was born, the the name of the website, the podcast, And it was like, you know what? It is a gift. I am thinking before I speak. I am putting together all of my words carefully and saying what I think is most important, and it’s a gift. And my extroverted friend might be doing something different where they’re thinking out loud most of the time, and they have their own gifts. But the fact that I have something to say, and she was actually giving me a compliment that you have valuable things to say because people listen, and that’s where this all started.

Cari Hall [00:07:26]:

Yeah. I I mean, I have a a friend. You know, her, Lori, She used to say people had this stream of consciousness talking. So, like, whatever thought came into their head and they spoke it out, she was not using that as compliment, but that was really where extroversion kind of where, you know, I first kind of heard of extroversion. She didn’t use those terms because she didn’t really understand what that was. but she would just talk about that person just has a stream of consciousness and whatever thought comes into their head, they speak it. So you have to kind of filter out what was the actual pieces of nuggets. Whereas as introverts, we kind of filter it out first before it spits out of our mouth. So we think to speak versus we or we think first and then speak versus thinking to speak.

David Hall [00:08:08]:

Yeah.

Cari Hall [00:08:08]:

So exactly what you said.

David Hall [00:08:10]:

Yeah. And a big part of this work was realizing that We all have gifts no matter if we’re introvert or extrovert or have many other nuances in our personality. It’s not good or bad. But the person that’s speaking to think needs to recognize those gifts and vice versa. And so that was a big part of this too.

Cari Hall [00:08:30]:

Right. Right. and now here you are. Host of quiet and strong podcasts most of the time. So for today, Alright. Now, you also asked your guests to bus submits from time to time. And now it’s your turn. What are as a myth that you hear a lot, that you wanna bust? And what’s the truth?

David Hall [00:08:52]:

And I’ve done a couple shows on this. So, you know, the top

Cari Hall [00:08:55]:

10. You know, there’s top 10 and 10 more. So give us another one.

David Hall [00:08:59]:

And it it comes up it comes up. I’m gonna give the most common ones. I think that’s important. So number one that people always say is that introversion is shyness. And introversion is not shyness. Introverts or extroverts can be shy. and it’s a lack of confidence. And the good thing is introverts can overcome shyness. A lot of it might come from understanding your introversion. So that’s a big piece. And something really related to that is introverts don’t like people.

Cari Hall [00:09:37]:

Right. So if you like people,

David Hall [00:09:38]:

you must not be an introvert. Right. Right. And and we’re all we all like people. we may need people in different doses and different settings that, you know, might be our preference, but we absolutely like people. And it’s funny. You’ve heard this a lot from me. I’ll be talking with someone And they really wanna know. I might introvert or extrovert, and they’ll say, well, I need some time alone. I need some time to prepare for things and a downtime after. I like people, so I must be an extrovert. And that’s a big myth. So you can like people and be an introvert. Absolutely. You might wanna, you know, have smaller settings. You might wanna have more one on one or small groups. You might need a break after certain situations. Along with that, let’s talk about the definition really fast. Often I hear people say the main difference between introverts and extroverts is how they get their energy. you know, introverts often need time alone after socializing and extroverts get their energy from socializing.

Cari Hall [00:10:37]:

Right. And I know while you agree with that, you say, and.

David Hall [00:10:41]:

And yes. Yes. You know me better than anybody. So I agree with that. There is a lot of truth there. but it’s so much more. And if we stop at that definition, I think we’re missing out on some understanding. So what I say is introversion is like it sounds. returning inward more often than not. Some great creativity comes. You know? We have some great imaginations We can think of some really amazing ideas, some innovation, all kinds of things. And it’s not just that we need to take a break from people Okay. But we need to have time to think, time to focus, time to be strategic. We need a lot of time. We also need to collaborate, and we need to spend some time with people. And that’s an important thing to understand. The other piece of it is I don’t like the thought that introverts are drained by people. And, you know, I’ll say something, and you know this, you’ve never drained me. In fact, you being with you often energizes me. I I’d never drained by you. you know, and hopefully you feel the same about me.

Cari Hall [00:11:39]:

Most of the time.

David Hall [00:11:40]:

Most of yeah. I knew you were gonna say that most of the time. So it’s not all people, but as an introvert, You need to know, you know, what does drain you? When do you need to recharge? And so that’s an important piece, but I don’t think it’s correct to say that I’m always drained by people because it’s simply not true, but I need to understand the situations where I do need some time to relax or recharge You know, like, when I do the podcast, I do give myself an hour ahead of time to get into it, and I give myself on my schedule an hour afterward to recharge if I need to. If the conversation, even though I might have totally enjoyed it, I might have had a great guest. It just might have been draining to me, and I I need I need to make sure that I don’t do back to back interviews. That wouldn’t work so well for me.

Cari Hall [00:12:25]:

Right. One other thing that for us, like, when you’re home, you actually work from home now, and you have meetings all day long on zoom. And I know that drains you, but it also drains me because it’s noise that’s in my house. And so I actually go to a different room where I can have quiet, not because I need to recharge, but because I need to work, and I can’t focus. Now whether that’s a fully introvert or a highly sensitive issue. We joke about that. Now that that I’ve discovered, I might be highly sensitive because I don’t like knowing But I think that that’s something quiet time to actually work and the time alone to focus and do some of the deep work that I need to do without having other noise and other people around is a place that’s very valuable for me.

David Hall [00:13:10]:

Yeah. And if you don’t know, Cari’s always worked from home for ever since we started having kids. And, you know, in the pandemic hit, all of a sudden, she had me and our 3 kids all in her space that she was used to having alone. You know? And, again, I think you’d need to focus. That’s a good example. Yes. As introverts, we need time to focus, but being highly sensitive, you’re also sensitive to noise and For some reason, I’m not as highly sensitive, but, again, all these things that we discuss are not good or bad, but if you can understand them, understand the strengths behind them, understand your needs behind them. You can be very successful.

Cari Hall [00:13:45]:

Right. And so instead of being very distracted from the noise in the house, finding out that if I go to a quieter place, I can get my work done. I can focus easier and just block everybody out that’s around me. then I get my work done because that is where my introversion can really let me focus and do deep work, but not with the noise. Can’t do with the noise. Did you have any other miss along with that?

David Hall [00:14:08]:

One of them is people say introverts don’t have a lot to say. And

Cari Hall [00:14:13]:

— Oh, there are so many words in your mouth.

David Hall [00:14:17]:

Yeah. It’s the opposite. It’s we have so much to say because we’re always thinking. You know, sometimes both of us, our ideas don’t stop sometimes. And we definitely like to talk them through sometimes, but It’s just that we’re not sharing everything, but we have a lot to share. And, I mean, I’m a podcast host because I do have a lot to say. You know, I’ve I’ve written a book. I’m I’m gonna write another one. So we have a lot to say. It’s just we’re not verbalizing all of it. We’re we’re saving what we think is the good stuff that people need and want to hear.

Cari Hall [00:14:49]:

Right. And oftentimes, I think introverts spend a lot of time thinking about it. And sometimes we don’t even recognize that people might wanna hear more than we actually share because we’re so worried about, well, they only need this piece or I only wanna share this piece. Sometimes it’s harder for introverts to share because we don’t wanna overshare because we see other people overshare, so we we’re a little more holding things closely.

David Hall [00:15:12]:

Yeah. And I’ll add to that for me anyway. I know that sometimes everything’s so clear in my head because I’ve thought it through so many times. that I might take some details for granted that I understand, but I might need to take a little bit extra time and share more so that people understand my details. So that’s something that I I a need I have is, you know, make sure that you’re sharing all that great stuff in your head. that you’ve thought about a lot that maybe somebody else hasn’t.

Cari Hall [00:15:41]:

Right. because you’ve spent all that time thinking about it. So, you know, of course, it’s crystal clear.

David Hall [00:15:45]:

Of course.

Cari Hall [00:15:45]:

But it but you can’t download what’s in your brain to somebody else. You have to actually put it into words and get it out there. sometimes it that’s a little bit tricky for us introverts to get all of these fabulous ideas and everything that’s going on in our heads down on paper or down on you know, explain to somebody else in a way that they can see it as crystal clear as we see it.

David Hall [00:16:06]:

Yeah. And the last one and, again, there’s many more The last one is when people say introverts can’t be good at, and you could fill in the blank. You could say leadership or public speaking or networking. And I’ll say that, yeah, you can be good at anything It’s just you’re gonna take a different approach. You’re gonna take your introverted strengths and needs into consideration and you’re gonna succeed as a leader in your own way different than your extroverted friend might.

Cari Hall [00:16:39]:

Right. So we covered several minutes. Let’s move on to the next question you often ask your guests is about what their introverted superpowers are. Now if you’ve listened to the show very much, you know, that David has his own, what he says are his superpowers that are deep thinking and being analytical. Now, David, I don’t know if everybody else knows you like I do, but I know that you love marble and you love DC. So rather than asking you what superhero you’d wanna be or rehashing your superpowers, I wanna know what superhero is gonna play you when quiet and strong, the movie comes out. Who’s gonna be the superhero that plays David?

David Hall [00:17:17]:

Okay. So actual superheroes?

Cari Hall [00:17:20]:

Actual superheroes. Not not the start. Not the not the actor. The actual superhero. We’re gonna call him.

David Hall [00:17:26]:

Alright. Shall we say Marvel or see. Let’s start with Marvel. I know I know you think I look like Thor. So — That’s, of course. I don’t think he’s a introvert. I’m pretty sure he’s a extrovert. Maybe captain America. He’s probably an introvert. Superman has the fortress of solitude.

Cari Hall [00:17:41]:

Yes. You would like one of those.

David Hall [00:17:43]:

It might be a little cold in there, though. And, of course, Superman’s strong. So you know, quiet and strong, superman strong. But then there’s Batman who’s very strategic. He also has the bat cave, so that’s probably comparable to the Fortress of solitude.

Cari Hall [00:17:58]:

Right. And he has a cool car and some other fun things.

David Hall [00:18:00]:

Yeah. Yeah. He has all kinds of gadgets and cool stuff. So let’s let’s go with Batman.

Cari Hall [00:18:05]:

Alright. Now that Batman’s gonna play David in the quiet and strong movie, which which version of Batman?

David Hall [00:18:10]:

Oh, Christian Bail. He’s bad.

Cari Hall [00:18:11]:

Of course.

David Hall [00:18:12]:

Yeah. He’s bad, man.

Cari Hall [00:18:13]:

I knew the answer to that. Yeah.

David Hall [00:18:15]:

And just — — so many other Christian Bale. He’s Batman.

Cari Hall [00:18:19]:

Alright. And then how did your understanding? We’re moving on here. How did your understanding of introversion help you become more confident over the years?

David Hall [00:18:28]:

With all introverts were deep thinkers Some people are more empathic in their deep feelers also, deep thinkers and deep feelers. I I am definitely a deep thinker like we’ve been talking about. And when you don’t understand that you think before you speak, you can be in a situation that you kind of feel less than If you’re thinking and waiting to speak and other people are just talking nonstop, they might say, why are you so quiet? I got that as a child. I got that

Cari Hall [00:18:58]:

as a child. I got that as a child. I got that as a

David Hall [00:19:01]:

child. I got that as a child. I got that as a so helpful, isn’t it when you say that? Yeah. Just yeah. If you’re listening, don’t don’t say that. No matter if you’re introvert or extrovert, just it doesn’t help. How do you come back from that? Oh, no. Not. Just, yeah, don’t say that. So that’s part of it. You know, understanding that I need to think and then I’ll speak. And other people might be talking a lot, and that’s okay. The other thing is I think we have a lot of great ideas. And guess what? If you are an original thinker, if you’re a deep thinker and you think some original thoughts and you share those, You might get some funny looks, but we need those original thoughts. We need people to come up with new and creative and innovative ways of doing things. And, again, somebody might make you feel less than, like, oh, that’s strange, but it might just be something that we need to change the world. Right?

Cari Hall [00:19:44]:

Right. Gotta help people change that perception. Now it’s funny. You you gave us kind of the definition of introversion at the beginning of this episode. You talked about how it wasn’t just the need to recharge, but it was also kind of going into your thoughts more often than not and thinking before speaking, but a lot of times, there’s a negative perception around the word introversion. And sometimes I think it’s confused with some other terms that also go along with that that maybe give people a little bit more cause to struggle. So we’ve got the term shyness. We’ve got the term social anxiety. We’ve got the term socially awkward. And then I’m gonna throw highly sensitive in there too because that is a little bit different, but all of these sometimes get rolled into that term introversion. Interversion as we talked about is is something that comes naturally to us. and it’s something that we can learn to embrace, but it’s not really something that we can fix or that needs to be fixed, but needs to be understood. Talk to us about these other things. So shyness, social anxiety, highly sensitive, and socially awkward.

David Hall [00:20:51]:

Let’s go ahead and start with being highly sensitive. And both words sometimes get a have a negative connotation, introversion, and being highly sensitive, but they — I

Cari Hall [00:21:00]:

was not gonna be highly sensitive. I told you. I’m not. I know. I know. Just because noise and smell make me wanna punch things. That doesn’t make me hypersensitive.

David Hall [00:21:10]:

Yeah. And and, you know, the thing about introversion is half the population are introverts. But like I said, you’ve always been confident So somebody may not label you as an introvert if they’re looking at the wrong definition. As far as that goes, someone could have always been confident been an introvert, been a deep thinker, but just always been confident maybe even outspoken. They’ve known who they are their whole lives, and that’s awesome. Some people like myself, may have been shy and anxious, learned to overcome it. And with me, it was understanding the things that we’re talking about. And then there’s some people that might still be shy And let’s talk about that. Like, shyness can be overcome. So I guess I said I was gonna start with highly sensor. Like you said, it it could be that You’re sensitive to your environment. You know, again, some good things can come from there. You’re you could be aware of things. Maybe you’re aware of things that other people aren’t Some people are more in touch with their emotions. And like I said, they might be kinda empathic and can really feel the feelings of others. So sometimes people will lump those things both into introverts. Like, oh, every introvert is highly sensitive. in touch with their feelings and, you know, in both cases, I’m not. I don’t know why. I don’t know why we have our different gifts, but it’s something just to understand. And we’ve had a lot of great guests talking about these topics. As I talk about introversion that has strengths and needs, being highly sensitive has strengths and needs too.

Cari Hall [00:22:38]:

And I think it’s also really important as we’re talking about these things. Sometimes people are looking for a label, but the label is only useful as far as, you know, you know what? It’s kind of like if you have a a can of food or something, the label helps you know what’s on the inside. but it doesn’t mean that you can’t make something really cool out of what’s inside. You know? It just I’m thinking of, like, a can of tomatoes. just because there’s there says tomatoes on the on the label. I’m like, great. I know what I can do with this. I know what that could make this into something really awesome. It doesn’t mean, oh, you know, yuck. So I think that we need to really take those labels and say, okay. How can this help me? Not how does this box me into a box?

David Hall [00:23:22]:

Absolutely. So with shyness, social anxiety, social awkwardness, They’re all related, but they’re not the same. Shyness is a lack of confidence, and you can gain confidence. And, again, introverts can be shy. Extroverts can be shy. But I will say, I think it’s really important as you’re working to overcome shyness and gain confidence, keep your introversion in mind. You know, back in my journey when I was in college, I read a book how to overcome shyness. And as I look back, it was definitely written by an extrovert, and I could see why.

Cari Hall [00:23:59]:

Never been shy a day in their life, probably.

David Hall [00:24:01]:

But, yeah, I don’t know. Maybe they overcame Shinesse’s expert. I I don’t know. I’ll have to look into that book again, but just understanding that you think before you speak, Another thing I don’t know if we’ve hit on enough is that you also need to prepare for things. If you’re giving a presentation and attending a meeting, especially an important meeting, we like to think about things ahead of time, and we do better with that. So you can overcome shyness. But, again, in the sources that you use, keep your introversion in mind, and how you work that may be different from the extrovert. And social anxiety, it’s more of a mental health condition and it’s an intense fear or worry about social situations. And, again, you know, your introversion may or may not be a part of that. It probably is. There may be a lot more to it, but keep your introversion in mind. Also, if if you’re working with a therapist, They should understand introversion. I had a great guest on my show talking about small talk. He was a therapist and an extrovert. A part of what made the episode on small talk so helpful for introverts is he fully understood introversion even though he was an extrovert. And so keep that in mind. And then social awkwardness introverts or extroverts can be socially awkward. But if you don’t know that you think before you speak, and you don’t know that you need to prepare, or even get familiar with your surroundings, take the time to look at what’s going on around you. I know I’ve had some socially awkward moments when I’m lost in pot and maybe someone walk by, hey, David, and I’m not noticing them because I’m lost in thought. That could be really socially awkward. I’ve learned, oh, you know, just tell Oh, I was lost and thought, how you doing? You know? So with me, I’ve largely overcome all of these things by understanding my introversion. Again, there may be more to it than that, but understanding your introversion is a big piece of it. And then with social awkwardness, we’re all gonna have awkward moments no matter what. It’s normal. It’s very normal.

Cari Hall [00:26:01]:

Yeah. Absolutely. And I think that’s particularly when so, like, shyness learning to get a little bit more confident getting some little positive step you can learn to overcome your shyness socially awkward. You can kind of practice and and also just really realize that that’s normal and you know, learning how to understand people’s cues, you can get better at it. And then social anxiety, like you said, sometimes that’s gonna need a therapist because that’s gonna need a little bit more, but somebody who really understands if you’re an introvert and socially anxious that those are 2 separate things, but they can go together. I’m not a therapist, so I can’t say you can overcome social anxiety, but I think that you can have help to get better at that. And then by understanding your introversion, you can understand how to navigate that better with your particular self. And understanding your introversion can help you navigate some of those things and understanding where they’re different can help you navigate and where to overcome and what you can change and what you can’t change.

David Hall [00:26:58]:

Yeah. I’ve talked to a therapist about this. Sometimes you can overcome it, but often with social anxiety, you might just be learning to manage it, and it may be, you know, persistent but you definitely can get better at managing it. Perhaps you can overcome it.

Cari Hall [00:27:12]:

Alright. Now one other term that comes up really often that I’m not gonna lump in with those because it’s a little bit different, but this is your favorite term. He cringes every time it comes out.

David Hall [00:27:22]:

I know.

Cari Hall [00:27:22]:

When someone comes along and says, I’m an ambiverts because they don’t wanna be an introvert, but they’re not quite an extrovert or they say sometimes I’m an introvert and sometimes I’m an extrovert or like we talked about earlier, I like to talk to people, but then I need to recharge. What do you say to those people?

David Hall [00:27:40]:

Okay. So Yeah. Ambervert, I don’t use the term myself because I really do think that you have a preference for either turning inward more often than not. And you know, everybody turns inward. Everybody focuses externally, but introverts are definitely turning inward more than not. extroverts are focus more on their outer world. And when I hear Amber, a lot of times, it’s more like I’m okay. You know? I I’m a little of both. They I I I hear that so much. I’m a little of both. And if you’re saying that sometimes I like to be alone, And sometimes I like to be social as an introvert. The being social like we talked about a little bit ago doesn’t make you extrovert. We all like people. So to me, Ambervert is really, like, you’re equal between going inward and focusing outward. And to me, it’s often an excuse or just to make you feel better, like, hey. I got the best of both worlds, but, really, you’re great no matter what. And It doesn’t even really help you that much if you say I’m an introvert. I’m extrovert. I’m a ambivert. If you don’t know what’s behind that, So if you don’t know, hey. Here’s my strengths. You know, like, in my case, I’m very analytical. I’m good at thinking through things, but I need some time afterward. or I like to have deep conversations. I need to learn how to do small talk so I can get to those deep conversations, but I like to have deeper conversations. If you don’t understand all of that, then it doesn’t matter what your label is. So I don’t personally use Ambervert, but I do think that you can really get to know your strengths, your needs, strategies for success. We talk a lot about that on the podcast. I hear from my guests. their strategies for success in very many different areas. And so it’s not about the label. The label can be very helpful because, you know, you and I are a lot alike, so we can learn What are other successful introverts doing? How are they approaching life? So you can learn a lot from them, but none of us are exactly the same. So get beyond the label, figure out who you are, take some things like the Myers Briggs or the CliftonStrengths, read some great books, list to a podcast like this one. Do some self reflection. Introverts are amazing as self reflection. So you can get to know who you are. So Again, it’s not all about the label, introvert, extrovert, and the labels can help. It just don’t stop there.

Cari Hall [00:30:01]:

Right. And there’s so many different facets to people’s personality. It’s like just saying I’m an ambivert, so I don’t have to be an introvert because for whatever reason you have that as a negative, that doesn’t help you at all. No. Just it just maybe, like you said, makes you feel a little bit better, but, yeah, I agree. 100%. I don’t just vote whatever he votes tell you. I vote what I vote. Did you agree with that? Alright. Now we kinda talked about this. A a lot of people feel like being an in might hold them back from success. And maybe that’s why they don’t even want to, you know, they wanna say I’m an Amber Heard or whatever, or maybe they have some of these other issues that we talk about, like, the shyness or social anxiety, but how has an introvert helped you be successful, not holding you back? And how do you use your strengths to get ahead?

David Hall [00:30:50]:

So it’s just really a matter of, you know, in my case, I I am a deep thinker. I like to solve problems. I I like I need to give myself some time. One of the best things that I ever did was block up the 1st 90 minutes of my day so that I could do some thinking. I could get ready for the day. I could figure out, you know, if there was something I needed to do that day and give it some thought, you know, make some great plans. And my colleague that’s maybe sitting right next to me might not need that same time alone. And that was a big thing to understand is I have needs. They’re valid, and the person next to me might not have the same needs, and that’s fine. but I also have some great strengths. So, you know, getting back to the business that you run, you’re a lot more creative than me. You know? You do my artwork. You do a lot of cool things. I keep track of the money. Uh-uh, you know, it’s not my favorite thing. And then it’s not that you couldn’t do it either, but you really Is

Cari Hall [00:31:53]:

this still particularly like to?

David Hall [00:31:55]:

Yeah. I know. I know. but you, like, really excel in some creativity. And we’re both introverts, but I couldn’t even touch that creativity. A lot of times, you’re like, oh, just do this. I’m like, yeah. But I don’t have your gifts. And so it’s just different understanding our gifts, our strengths, and not comparing ourselves to others, especially when it comes to our needs. maybe I’m at a conference center and I give a presentation. If I need to walk around outside for a few minutes after, normal, and somebody else might not be doing that. They might be bouncing from person to person and getting to know somebody where I just I just need a break. And there’s been times in my life where I would have felt funny about that. I would have felt strange, but now it’s like, hey. That’s what I need. It’s cool.

Cari Hall [00:32:39]:

Yeah. That’s awesome. I think too, you’ve talked about comparing, yourself to other people, and I think that’s super crucial, but a lot of times, we’re comparing ourselves not even to other real people, but to the ideal of what we see either on TV or what someone else presents, you know, that we see on the surface, and we don’t see their insides. So we’re comparing ourselves to something that’s not even real. And I think that really important to remember as well when we’re thinking about what do I need and just find the way to make yourself successful. Like, you have said, you stopped comparing. and just started understanding how to make yourself better without trying to be road blocked by what you see in imaginary your superhero or whatever.

David Hall [00:33:23]:

Right. And sometimes it’s like, you know, you might be comparing yourself to others, but you can’t see inside them. You don’t know their preferences. you don’t know what’s going on. So, yeah, just really learn to be yourself and be authentic, and you’ll have so much more success when you’re yourself. I I’ve learned that definitely.

Cari Hall [00:33:41]:

You talk a lot about careers communication and confidence because you spent many, many years in higher education and working with staff and students and everything. What are some strategies that leaders can use to help their teams? or when you’re working with other people, how can you help bring those strengths out both introverts or extroverts? How can they learn to communicate better with one another? How can you leverage those strengths to help improve that team’s success?

David Hall [00:34:08]:

I think a lot of it is just what we were just talking about. Help people come to that self awareness. help people come to the awareness of other people on your team. again, that’s where I got my most benefit, even after having a masters, It was that professional development where you’re sitting across from somebody and you’re talking about your strengths They’re talking about their strengths. I tell a story. So with Gallup, with the CliftonStrengths, They have a definition for empathy. And there’s 34 strengths if you’ve never taken it before. They give you your top 5. Normally, they’re telling you focus on yourself. I don’t worry about all all your strengths. I saw mine and this empathy was number 34 for me.

Cari Hall [00:34:54]:

because you’re just a meanie.

David Hall [00:34:56]:

I know. I’m just I’m a cold hearted meanie. Right? And I’m sitting across from somebody. I knew pretty well. I worked with for a while. And she was I think number 1 her empathy was number 1. And, you know, she just talked about how she felt the feelings of others. And I’m like, oh, yeah. the way she’s describing it. That’s not happening for me. And what it is is I actually do care. You know, I care, and I wouldn’t be doing all the various things I do if I didn’t care, but Mine’s a more mental thing. If I’m trying to help someone instead of feeling their feelings, I’m putting myself into their shoes using my imagination and thinking Okay. So it’s more analytical approach. Either is right or wrong. I just don’t have that gift to automatically be in tune with people’s feelings. and that was so helpful. So a lot of it is understanding this, understanding that we have different communication styles, understanding that some people are gonna do better in writing, some people are gonna do better in speaking, finding ways to help everybody’s voices be heard, It’s all tricky. It takes time, but a lot of it just comes from awareness.

Cari Hall [00:36:00]:

Right. And I I know that you’ve done this, and I’ve done this as well. It was like, you see people with certain strengths, put them to use using those strengths. Don’t try to say, oh, well, you’re really bad at this thing over here. So let’s make you do that. to get better, let’s use you where you’re the most powerful and you’re the the most force for making change and doing good because this is your superpower. We’re not gonna put David in the kitchen to make the super dinner. That’s not gonna be his superpowers, but he has a lot of other great superpowers.

David Hall [00:36:33]:

Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I’m not the best cook. Cari is the most amazing cook, so I haven’t learned to be a very good cook because I can’t compete. So along those lines, you know, I I’ve I’ve been talking about CliftonStrengths. It was really instrumental. You know, someone that I really look up to his name’s Marcus Buckingham. He actually wrote the book that went along with the first, strengths quest. It was called Now Discover strengths that he did with Donald Clifton. And since then, he’s written a new book called Love And Work, and it’s really getting at what you were just saying. where he’s like, you really need to make it about the outcomes and not the process. So you need to let people use their strengths to get to the outcomes and not worry as much about the process, how they got there, but that they got there. And you might have a couple of people doing the same job, But, you know, as much as you can, let them be unique and bring out their gifts to get to that outcome, but they might go about it in different ways. And that’s hard sometimes. You know, we wanna make a cookie cutter approach, and it’s — Yeah.

Cari Hall [00:37:37]:

Well, and sometimes we’re so wanting to be in control of something, you know, like, well, you have to put it on you have to do it this way or this way or exactly this way. Whereas, there might be a different, more creative, more cool way that actually comes out with an even better result that you didn’t think of because that’s not your way.

David Hall [00:37:53]:

Right.

Cari Hall [00:37:54]:

I think that’s that’s super important to let people kind of learn and explore and grow within their strengths and let those those strengths really blossom when you can help them as you know, as learning to work together. And also, I know you’ve talked a ton about this, but helping other people recognize their strengths and strengths of other people around them and how to utilize those for synergy, and I can work with this person and we can do something really cool because this person brings this to the table and I bring this to the table. So I think that’s a really great way of helping build up those teams and get things really done and accomplished in a way that maybe wouldn’t have been before if you just had to have it exactly your way. anyway, and I know you’ve done a lot of workshops and taught this to a lot of people with the strengths and And with the Myers Briggs, you talk a lot about different personality types. So your listeners probably know that you’re an INTJ. Sometimes that’s called a mastermind. at our house meetings that it might be the evil mastermind. Tell us what being an INTJ means. how those different personality facets. I I know you’ll you’ll talk about this, that the Myers Briggs has, like, 16 different measurements that they kind of pair up to get you this 4 letter code. And that gives you even a little bit more insight into your personality and how you are.

David Hall [00:39:10]:

Yeah. And I I love it. I focus on introversion, extroversion because I think there’s some significant misunderstanding and things that we can do to understand our strengths as an introvert and have extroverts understand goes both ways, but there’s so many other facets to our personality. I think that Myers Briggs gets at some of those. You know, it’s it’s a tool. So it’s something to reflect on. You know, it’s not gonna name everything about you, but it’s something that is a good tool to go off of. So, you know, but I, it’s either an i or an e, introversion, extraversion. That’s what we’ve been talking about, or an n or an s which the n is for intuitive because I guess the I was already taken. And then sensing — That

Cari Hall [00:39:54]:

always messes me up. Yeah.

David Hall [00:39:55]:

Yeah. You know, with intuitive, you’re really a big picture person. You see you have intuition about things, whereas the sensor is really more concrete with the details and and things like that.

Cari Hall [00:40:06]:

And their differences — — people who really like the step by step by step by step whereas like, you and I with the end, we’re just like, here’s the big picture. Go do it.

David Hall [00:40:15]:

Yeah. Yeah. And we think of the details, but We wanna start with the big picture and someone that’s sensing might wanna start with the details. Again, we need everybody. We need people that are big make sure we need people that are are worried about the details and and ask some great questions about that. And then the next one is is thinking versus feeling, and we’ve kinda talked about that a little bit. Like, you know, I’m definitely a thinker, more analytical, feeling someone could actually feel the feelings of others and, you know, be more empathic. And so far, you and I are all the same on those. You know, again, there’s nuances here and there. And the last one is the judging, which doesn’t mean, like, I’m placing judgment on somebody, but it means that I’m more scheduled, more organized. That’s important. So this is where we differ. You know, perceiving means, you know, you’re more spontaneous, more free, that kind of thing. I I talk about this on on my show or shows that I’ve been guests on. You know, I say that’s a difference between us. I say, it’s it’s a good difference. If we tried to change it, there’s no changing it. We wouldn’t be happy if we were trying to change each other, but, you know, I think you’re amazing. Hopefully, you think the same. but we have to embrace our differences. And even though we’re a lot the same, which is probably why we’re very happy together, we have some differences, but they’re good. And so I always say that, you know, I bring a little order to your life, and here’s where you’re the editor and you can disagree with me because you’re actually on the show, and I can’t just say, I don’t know my wife would agree, but now you’re here, and you could either disagree now or edit it out later.

Cari Hall [00:41:50]:

I always tease that he means the chaos at house. So — Yeah. Yeah. — I bring the chaos and he likes to bring the order, but, you know, chaos is more fun, I think.

David Hall [00:41:59]:

Right. But sometimes the order does stress me out. Sometimes I do get anxiety from that. And, definitely, you are a calming influence in my life because you’re more spontaneous. And I think that those differences are good for both of us. And, again,

Cari Hall [00:42:12]:

they’re — Right. —

David Hall [00:42:13]:

they’re natural. We need to embrace them, not try to change them. You try to change somebody. you’re you’re not gonna be happy.

Cari Hall [00:42:20]:

Yes. Again, it’s good. I don’t have to do the books because I don’t really like that. I could, but I don’t like it.

David Hall [00:42:24]:

And — Right. Right.

Cari Hall [00:42:25]:

you know, and you don’t have to do all the artwork because you don’t really like it. You could, but you don’t really

David Hall [00:42:29]:

like it. No. But it’s not even that. I wouldn’t be as good at it. I just wouldn’t. You know? And, again, that’s another thing about our strengths. Sometimes we’re so close to him. You might think, yeah. Of course, David can just do artwork like me, but, no, It’s a compliment. You’re gifted. And and just understand that, yeah, I could throw some together. I do. I do make design things all the time, and they don’t look as good as yours. But, you know, anyway,

Cari Hall [00:42:53]:

so we have we always joke if I was doing the books, it wouldn’t add up to the penny. Like, it does Oh,

David Hall [00:42:57]:

could you wanna care? Yeah. You wanna care. Right? I needed to I needed to add a — Like,

Cari Hall [00:43:01]:

there’s some dollars in there. It’s all

David Hall [00:43:02]:

fine there. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, we we have these conversations.

Cari Hall [00:43:06]:

and not only us. So he’s in INTJ. I’m in INTP, and then we have 3 kids. to extroverts, pretty sure, and one’s an introvert. How has understanding about strengths and personalities helped us kind of navigate having kids and just understanding all their differences because each kid comes and they are not the same as the last kid.

David Hall [00:43:29]:

Yeah. Yeah. I’ve said this, and I heard someone talking about it recently too. Just think. Did you have a brother or sister that was different than you? or do you have more than one child, or do you know somebody with more than one child? We come with gifts. And this was part of my, you know, I had many different things that really helped me understand that introversion was natural, and this was part of it is having 3 kids that we raised the same but they’re different. They’re all amazing. They’re all brilliant, but they come with their own gifts. And so that was part of it. And, you know, it just really helps me to understand the gifts One child might need to spend a little more time alone. Another child might have many friends that I can’t even keep track of, and that’s fine too. It’s all good. As a parent, you do have to just kinda nudge along, you know, like, if you have a child that’s spending all their time in their room. You you might you might need to help them, you know, understand their gifts and strengths. But at the same time, I think it’s been very helpful. I think about when I was a kid and there was no talk about introversion. And I could have really used some understanding, you know, about this, but I think it’s helped us as parents that definitely our kids are more well adjusted And, you know, we’re not perfect parents. You’re a better parent than me, but we’re not perfect parents, but letting them run with their gifts with with something because we have the understanding.

Cari Hall [00:44:54]:

Right. But also knowing when to step in and say, okay. My little extrovert, you have to get up in the morning. It’s time for you to come home from your friends and actually

David Hall [00:45:02]:

go

Cari Hall [00:45:03]:

or a little introvert. We’ve been very blessed with some some wonderful teachers in his life that helped match him up with some little friends that really helped give him the stability that he needed when, you know, that wasn’t necessarily something he might have been able to do on his own. Right. Correct. I think those understanding those things are where where you can help step in and lift them up a little bit where they can’t do it. And then in the other case, when you need to step in and and help them, you know, tone down a little bit. Anyway, your listeners may not know this about you, but David had 8 siblings. There were 9 kids in his house, and I had 10 kids in my house. So as introverts, Sometimes it’s a little bit of a challenge to find that alone time and also trying to find your space in, you know, in a world of chaos when you’re you’re a person that need maybe a little bit order. What would you go back in time? If you could go back and talk to your parents of Little David, what would you say to them? How to help Little David?

David Hall [00:46:01]:

Wow. Oh, no. That’s a tough that’s a tough question. I love my parents, but as I just said, there was no talk of introversion, extraversion. You know, I I definitely had a lot of sisters. I love my sisters, but it was a while before I got a brother. And, you know, Probably at the time, you know, I thought that I was spending time alone because, the only boy with a lot of sisters for a long time, but I think it’s this time I needed. And I had a lot of great friends. It was definitely a smaller circle of friends, which is typical for introverts. I had a lot of great friends. But I think of, like, taking a long bike ride or walking home, a very long walk from school. You know, I could’ve taken the bus but just because I enjoyed it. You know, again, I had great friends. I I would organize parties, but I also needed that time alone. So I don’t know what I would say to my parents. I definitely just overall at the time, there was not a lot of talk and it was not something they understood, but I’m so encouraged. I’ve had teachers on my show where there’s a lot more thought going into helping the kids that are called the quiet kids really having their voices heard. So it’s it’s very encouraging. you know, just shows like this or books. Marty Olsen Laney, she’s written a couple books. She’s definitely talked about the introverted child, I highly recommend that one or her other book just on introverts in general. So there’s a lot more that’s known that wasn’t known back then.

Cari Hall [00:47:26]:

Right. So we managed through here. So but moving forward, the next generation has the benefit of of the parents’ understanding a little bit more about their kiddos. And, yeah, you’ve definitely had some amazing teachers that have been on here and talked about some some really cool things. Now growing up then as a teenager or a college age, David, what would you go back in time and tell yourself? Cause this is the time those college years and teenage years are kind of when you’re looking and really comparing yourself to others and saying, why am I not like this person or that person, or why can’t I do this the way that person does? So what would you go back and tell yourself as you versus you then?

David Hall [00:48:07]:

All the things that we’ve been talking about. You know what? This is your this is your strength. This is your gift. It’s normal that you wanna go deep into conversation that you wanna have a close circle of friends. All the things that we’re talking about would have been really helpful to know. And I definitely like college better than high school. There’s some just crazy peer pressure in high school where you’re supposed to be a certain way. and definitely college you feel a little more freedom to be yourself. And so that’s where it really I started to understand myself. And, again, it took a long time. But I would say to that self of mind, hey. You know, you’re amazing. You have great gifts. Other people have their own gifts. Be you, you know, be authentic.

Cari Hall [00:48:48]:

Right. I think that’s what’s the biggest message to get out there. Alright. We’re just about here at the end of the time, but You wrote your first book, minding your time, time management productivity and success, especially for introverts a few years ago, and that was a a big effort. I know because I was there. What are some key to takeaways just quickly from that book? Why is it important for an introvert to have an introvert time management book?

David Hall [00:49:12]:

Yeah. So, hopefully, you’re ready for the next one. Cari’s my photographer, my editor. She designed my covers, you know, helping me get marketing done. But, anyway, And when I wrote that book, I was figuring out that I was an introvert. I had a job that was full time, but sometimes even took more hours than that. as we’ve talked about, Cari and I run a business together, and we have 3 kids. And so while I’m continuing to research and study introversion, I’m also studying time management, David Allen’s book. Anything’s done was really instrumental to me. But as I’m reading these various books, I’m like, oh, I need this as an introvert, but they’re not calling it out that way. And so that’s what made me my first book be specifically on that. So it’s things like you need to prepare for things. You need to organize your time so that you have time to think ahead of time or that you need to recharge after a particular thing. You know, maybe you just gave a presentation to fifty people, and it’s took a lot out of you. You need to put that into your calendar that, hey. You know what? This 30 minutes, taking lunch or I’m taking a break. I might still be doing a little work, but I’m alone to process that kind of thing. Capturing our ideas. You know, we have a lot of great ideas. just not getting overwhelmed and just really, making your approach, your approach, you know, giving yourself that time to think to focus like we’ve been talking about. So that’s how I decided to write that first book.

Cari Hall [00:50:37]:

Alright. And now You’re working on the next book. So what is that gonna be about?

David Hall [00:50:44]:

It’s gonna be more about introversion It’s gonna be about confidence, gaining confidence, just really having your voice heard, being able to communicate, whether it’d be in one on one small group public speaking. Just really having that confidence to get your voice out there to share your great ideas just to feel good about your strengths as a introvert while you’re honoring your needs. So it’s gonna be more of the kinds of things that we talk about on this show.

Cari Hall [00:51:14]:

Awesome. And it’s gonna be awesome. So we’ll watch for that.

David Hall [00:51:18]:

And you’re you’re you’re involved as you know.

Cari Hall [00:51:20]:

Yes. I know.

David Hall [00:51:21]:

So clear your calendar. Alright. Actually, it’s about halfway done right now.

Cari Hall [00:51:25]:

Yeah. Getting there. And I think we’re gonna have that one out, hopefully, the spring. Right?

David Hall [00:51:30]:

That’s the plan. Yep. That’s the plan. Early 2024. Yeah.

Cari Hall [00:51:35]:

Alright. Anything else you want, to know about you, this little kind of behind the scenes, and get David on the on the mic. Instead of a guest, anything that that you would like them to understand about themselves or wanna tell somebody who’s struggling with, you know, understanding themselves?

David Hall [00:51:50]:

No. But, Cari, this has been fun because it’s different, but, you know, we know each other really well. A lot of times, they’re on the other side, you know, listening and editing and things, and it’s been really fun to have this conversation. I always think about when I started blogging about 10 years ago, I still didn’t fully understand not only my introversion, but your introversion. You know, because you’d be sitting next to me. In our loft, we have a built in, like, two spaces and a built in desk that you know, came with the house. You know, we’d be sitting side by side. I’d be working on my blog and you’d be editing or working on something, and I’d ask you a question and you would just ignore me. And I’m like, what’s going on? You know, she ignored me. You know, she mad at me. But, no, you were just thinking. It’s a gift. And so all these things We have gifts. We need to get to know ours. We need to get to know other people’s. And, really, that leads to strength. And, that’s where you’ll be your best and be your strongest. So get to know yourself and your introverted needs and be strong, as I always say.

Cari Hall [00:52:51]:

Thanks for being on the show.

David Hall [00:52:53]:

Yeah. Thanks. It’s good to have you on that side and trying out this side here at the quiet strong studio. Thank you so much for joining me. I look forward to further connecting with you. Reach out at david@kwinestrunk.com. or check out the quiet and strong dot com website, which includes blog posts, links to social media, and other items. Send me topics or guests you would like to see on the show. If you’re interested in getting to know yourself better, there’s now a free type finder personality assessment on the Quiet and Strong website. This free assessment will give you a brief report, including the 4 letter Myers Briggs code. I’ll add a link to the show notes. There’s so many great things about being an introvert, so we need those to be understood. Get to know your introverted strengths and needs and be strong.

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