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Show Notes

Have you felt the pull towards a certain career, but were afraid that it wouldn’t be a good fit for an introvert?

Barry Karch has always considered himself an unlikely Realtor – quiet, introverted, unsalesy.  Not your prototypical formula for success!  Yet, Barry has been a top-selling Realtor for 36 years, selling as many as 100 homes per year.  He has come to realize that being an introvert in real estate gives him many advantages over his more extroverted colleagues.  He has created a podcast called The Real Estate UnSalesperson to encourage and inspire his fellow introverted Realtors and has just launched the UnSalesperson community.  His mission is to teach introverts that they have what it takes to succeed in real estate.

Whether you are interested in Real Estate or not, this episode is packed with wisdom on finding success because you are an introvert and not in spite of it.

Embracing Introversion: The Quiet Path to Sales Success

It was my pleasure to welcome guest Barry Karch, a seasoned realtor and the voice behind “The Real Estate UNSalesperson” podcast. Barry’s approach to sales through the lens of an introvert’s strengths is not just powerful—it’s a game-changer in an industry often stereotyped as the domain of extroverts.

Recognizing Introverted Strengths in Sales

One of the key takeaways from our conversation is the importance of understanding and embracing your introverted qualities. Barry’s own journey in the competitive real estate market is a testament to the fact that you don’t need to be the loudest voice in the room to make an impact. Instead, he advises fellow introverts to gradually gain confidence by focusing on their innate abilities such as listening, building deep relationships, and not being pushy.

Creating an Introvert-Friendly Community in Real Estate

Barry has not only thrived as an introverted realtor for over 36 years but has also created a supportive community for others like him. His podcast, “The Real Estate Unsalesperson,” is a trove of insights demonstrating how a mindset shift can make all the difference. By doubling down on their propensity to nurture long-term relationships and their preference for one-on-one connections, introverts can excel in sales—and Barry has proven just that.

Being Genuine Beats Being Pushy

During our chat, Barry emphasized that being genuine and present for his clients has brought him more success than any aggressive sales tactic could. His approach involves surprising his clients with thoughtful gestures long after they’ve made their purchase. This not only cements a lasting impression but also opens doors to referrals and a network built on genuine trust.

Success Comes in Different Flavors

We often fall for the myth that a sales career demands an extroverted personality—a misconception Barry and I are eager to debunk. Introverts and extroverts may tread different paths to achievement, yet both are equally capable of reaching their goals. As Barry shared, his success has hinged on creating meaningful connections and following through on commitments rather than casting a wide, impersonal net.

Valuing Long-Term Relationships Over Transactions

In an age where numbers often take precedence, Barry’s approach harks back to the core of what makes a transaction truly meaningful—the human connection. It’s about making clients feel valued and ensuring they know you’re there for them, not just during the deal but long after. This approach to sales is something many introverts might find aligns well with their natural inclinations.

Myths Busted: Introverts in Sales

Perhaps the most enlightening part of our discussion with Barry was the myth-busting around introverts in sales. Many introverts, including Barry at the start of his career, may question if they are cut out for sales. Yet, as our conversation showed, the thoughtful, empathetic, and authentic approach introverts bring to the table is in many ways superior and perfectly suited for the modern sales environment.

Final Thoughts on Introverted Selling

Bringing it all together, episode 49 of The Quiet And Strong Podcast with Barry Karch serves as a beacon of hope and a roadmap for introverts looking at a career in sales. My own take is that by understanding your strengths and needs as an introvert, and applying them with confidence, you can find success in ways that are fulfilling and personally sustainable.

I’m so grateful to Barry for sharing his insights and experiences with us. To all our listeners, don’t forget to check out Barry’s podcast, “The Real Estate Unsalesperson,” for more wisdom on leveraging your quiet strengths. And for those looking to connect, engage, or suggest topics and guests, I invite you to visit us at quietandstrong.com and join our vibrant community on social media.

Here’s to the quiet ones—may we continue to redefine success on our terms and showcase the strength in stillness.

Remember, in sales and in life, your introverted strengths are not just a part of you; they can be your superpower.

Until next time, stay quiet and strong.

Key Takeaways

  • Leveraging Introversion in Sales: Barry Karch shares how introversion can be a formidable strength in real estate and sales, focusing on relationship-building and trust rather than aggressive tactics.
  • Embracing Individual Strengths: Both Barry and David discuss the importance of understanding and utilizing one’s introverted traits to build confidence and succeed in a sales environment.
  • The Long-Term Relationship Approach: Barry emphasizes the value of establishing deep, long-term connections with clients instead of focusing solely on transactions, using strategies like staying in touch with clients through personal gestures.
  • Debunking Myths About Sales Success: The episode challenges the misconception that one needs to be extroverted to succeed in real estate, showing that introverts can thrive using a different set of skills and approaches.
  • Creating a Supportive Community: Barry talks about his podcast, “The Real Estate Unsalesperson,” and the unsalesperson community, aimed at inspiring introverts in the real estate industry to embrace their unique qualities.
  • Key Introverted Strengths: Barry lists attributes such as the ability to make people feel at ease, meticulous preparation, and the practice of not being pushy as introverted strengths that have contributed to his success in real estate.

Make Changes Now

Here are a few actions you can take after listening to Episode 49 with my guest Barry Karch:

  1. Embrace Your Introverted Strengths: Reflect on your own introverted qualities and how they can be used as strengths in your professional life. Identify key strengths such as listening skills, depth of concentration, and the ability to build deep relationships. Consider how these can be applied in your current job or a career in sales.
  2. Create a Personal Relationship Plan: Start planning how you can build stronger, one-on-one relationships with clients or customers in your field. This could mean scheduling follow-up calls, remembering special occasions, or reaching out with personalized communication that makes them feel valued.
  3. Seek Out Quiet and Recharge Time: If you’re introverted, ensure you schedule quiet time to recharge. Whether it’s setting aside time in the early morning for focused work, like Barry Karch does, or finding spaces throughout the day to be alone, this is crucial for maintaining your energy and productivity.
  4. Join or Form an Introvert-Focused Community: Look for or start a community of like-minded introverts in your industry. Barry Karch created an Unsalesperson community for realtors; you can find or start a group where introverts support each other and share strategies that align with their temperament.
  5. Evaluate Your Sales Approach: If you’re in sales or a similar field, take time to assess your approach. If high-pressure tactics don’t feel authentic to you, consider how you can be more genuine and create value through service. Focus on being helpful and truly understanding your clients’ needs rather than just closing a sale.

Contacts and Links

Guest: Barry Karch

Contact Barry:

Instagram – the_real_estate_unsalesperson

Facebook – the real estate unsalesperson podcast

UnSalesperson Community – patreon.com/unsalesperson

– – –

Contact the Host of the Quiet and Strong Podcast:

David Hall

Author, Speaker, Educator, Podcaster

quietandstrong.com
Gobio.link/quietandstrong
david [at] quietandstrong.com

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Timestamped Overview

00:00 Accidental realtor with an introverted personality.
04:26 Rejecting sales scripts and closing techniques, being authentic.
08:04 Long-term relationships built on trust and comfort.
12:55 Success in real estate doesn’t require extroversion.
15:53 Sales approach focused on long-term relationships.
17:39 Consistent follow-up and care foster lasting relationships.
23:48 Introvert finds success in real estate, encourages others.
26:43 Society favors extroversion, but introversion is valuable.
30:15 Addressed misconceptions about introversion and encouraged self-reflection.
32:55 Expressed gratitude, contact information, and call to action.

Podcast Transcript

Barry Karch [00:00:00]:
You don’t have to be great at networking in large groups, because it’s just that one person who’s sitting right in front of you you have to make the personal connection with.

David Hall [00:00:15]:
Hello, and welcome to the Quiet and Strong podcast, especially for introverts. I’m your host, David Hall, and the creator of quietandstrong.com. This is a weekly podcast dedicated to understanding the strengths and needs of introverts. Introversion is not something to fix, but to be embraced normally. We’ll air each episode on a Monday. Be sure to subscribe on your favorite platform, leave a review, tell a friend, help get the word out there. Barry Carch has always considered himself an unlikely realtor. Quiet, introverted, unsalesy. Not your prototypical formula for success. Yet Barry has been a top selling realtor for 36 years, selling as many as 100 homes per year. He has come to realize that being an introvert in real estate gives him many advantages over his more extroverted colleagues. He has created a podcast called The Real Estate Unsalesperson to encourage and inspire his fellow introverted realtors and has just launched the unsalesperson community. His mission is to teach introverts that they have what it takes to succeed in real estate. All right. Very excited to have my guest, Barry Karch. Barry. Welcome to the quiet and strong Podcast.

Barry Karch [00:01:33]:
Hi, David. I’m excited to be here. I love your show. You do a great job.

David Hall [00:01:37]:
Thank you. Yeah, and I’m really enjoying your podcast, too. Barry has The Real Estate Unsalesperson, and we’ll get into that, and Barry really brings his introverted strengths and honors his introverted needs in the work that he does. And he’ll tell you that he’s successful because he’s an introvert. So we are going to get into that. So, Barry, first of all, I just always like to start. Tell us about yourself and your journey through embracing your introversion.

Barry Karch [00:02:05]:
Okay, well, let me tell you how I got into real estate, and I’ll cover all that. I never planned to be a was when I was growing up, I didn’t think, wow, I want to be in real estate. That sounds like what I’d be good at. I kind of think of myself as an accidental realtor, because when I was in school, what I was good at were numbers. I was real good at math, science. So I probably would have been better suited to be an engineer or an accountant, probably a career more suited to an introvert to begin with, perhaps, where you’re more by yourself and working out theorems and equations. But when I was in school, I kind of was a little directionless. I didn’t know what I wanted to do. I went to college at the University of Texas at Austin, and I was a good student. I got A’s in pretty much everything, so I was a good student. That wasn’t a problem. I studied a lot as introverts maybe do, but I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life, nothing really grabbed me. I was kind of directionless. And my parents were in real estate, and they seemed to be doing quite well, so I thought I might as well just follow them into the business because I had no idea what else I wanted to do, even though I really wasn’t that suited for it. I didn’t think personality wise, being that I was an introvert and a quieter person. So I’ve always been that way. I’ve always been an introvert my whole life, and that’s how I ended up in real estate to begin with. It was not planned, it was very unexpected.

David Hall [00:03:44]:
Well, that’s how a lot of things go. So both your parents were in real estate?

Barry Karch [00:03:49]:
They were both in real estate, right. My father first and my mother joined him in the business. And as it so happens, my wife followed me into the business. Yeah, we’re both in real estate also, and we’re fairly untypical type of salespeople, but it’s worked quite well for us over time. Yeah.

David Hall [00:04:08]:
Okay, so your wife is an unsaled person too?

Barry Karch [00:04:12]:
She is, yeah. She definitely is. We work pretty much the same way.

David Hall [00:04:16]:
Very cool. So when you first started, did you feel like your introversion was holding you back or how did that go when you were just getting going?

Barry Karch [00:04:26]:
Yeah, when I started in the business, the sales trainers at the time, they were preaching scripts. This is what you’re supposed to say if someone gives you this objection, here’s what you say to overcome it, or here’s what you say to get somebody to list a house with you. And it just seemed so unnatural to me, the language, that the words they said were so unnatural that I just couldn’t do it. That was a challenge at the very beginning. Plus, they would teach all these they taught closing techniques where you’re supposed to be trying to talk somebody into buying a house or convincing them that, yes, they want to buy this house. So almost like we’re working as an adversary with our client rather than being on the same page with them. So those things just did not click for me at all. And I decided early on I was not going to do that. I was not going to do any scripts, I wasn’t going to use any of these sales closing techniques. I was just going to be myself. So that was the challenge at the beginning. I was going against what everybody taught me to do. And I just decided I’m going to be myself. I’m going to be a regular guy. I’m going to try to be friendly and helpful. And hopefully, if people see that I’m trying to help them and working for them, it’ll work. And they’ll end up buying a house from me.

David Hall [00:05:48]:
Yeah, scripts. I’ve always been resistant to scripts and whatever different jobs that’s come up. So what do you do instead? If it’s not a script, how do you plan how you’re going to interact with the person and build that relationship and that type of thing?

Barry Karch [00:06:02]:
Well, I don’t plan a certain technique or things to say. I just try to be myself and just be friendly and helpful. So I try to get to know the people when I first come in contact with them, find out a little about their situation, what they’ve been through, what they’re looking for, what they’re trying to accomplish, and I just put them first and try to help them. And I think it disarms them that people I think a lot of times when they contact a realtor, they’re expecting to get someone real pushy and aggressive or any type of salesperson for that matter. And when they find somebody who’s different, that’s not trying to push them into selling, but instead is putting them first and trying to help them, then they get to relax a lot more when they work with me, and we get to work quite well together. So that’s basically how it works.

David Hall [00:06:55]:
Yeah. And we were talking just a bit before the show, and I want someone just like you’re saying that cares about me, that is not trying to push me into anything. I think that’s probably the case for everybody, but I think introverts especially, because we want to think about things, we want to have some space to ponder, especially a big purchase like a home.

Barry Karch [00:07:16]:
Exactly. And I never try to push anybody into buying a home or any type of property. I let them make their own decision and have their own time. But I think a big purchase like a home, like you said, that is something that you can’t really talk somebody into buying anyways, because it’s not like you’re spending $10 on something. It’s a lot of money. I’ve had a few occasions early in my career where I felt like I wanted the sale more than my clients did, and that never worked out well, never had a good ending. So I learned pretty quickly that, no, they have to want it more than me, so it has to be right for them.

David Hall [00:07:55]:
Yeah, it’s a good way of looking at it. So were there some keys in understanding your introversion and that’s a strength for you?

Barry Karch [00:08:04]:
It probably took me a while to realize that, but after some time in the business, looking back, I’ve realized that, yes, that has led to my success. It hasn’t been a hindrance, but it’s been a plus, because people feel comfortable working with me, around me, because, again, I’m not going to be pushing them or trying to get them to buy something fast. They realize that I’m on their side, I’m working for them. I’m just trying to help them and do what’s best for them. So they relax around me more. They open up, they tell me what they like and don’t like, and we end up working quite well together. And I’ve developed some very long term relationships with past clients. People have come back 20 and even 30 years later to sell houses they bought from me. Yeah, it’s worked well. Building the trust and building a long term relationship.

David Hall [00:08:58]:
Okay. What would you say is a strength or two of yours in your introversion?

Barry Karch [00:09:05]:
Well, I think, number one, it’s putting people at ease, because, again, I’m not pushy with them, so they relax around me. So that’s been a strength. And second of all, I am very well prepared. Introverts like to prepare and do a lot of work ahead of time, so I have all the facts or figures or any information people might need already ready for them. And usually they’re impressed with my preparation when they talk to me. If they talk to another realtor, they say, wow, you’re way more prepared than the last person I talked to. So those are a couple of the strengths, I think, and just building trust, building trust with people because they come to realize I’m not trying to push them, and it helps to develop a long term relationship. So all those things are strengths of an introvert, I think.

David Hall [00:09:59]:
Absolutely. Preparation is key for us because we’re deep thinkers.

Barry Karch [00:10:04]:
Yeah, we don’t wing it.

David Hall [00:10:06]:
No, we don’t. And we’re not good at it. We’re deep thinkers. But that’s a good thing. Like I said, if I was coming to you, I would want, again, like, we’ve already talked about that. I know that you care about me, but, man, I also really want you to know your stuff that’s important to me and that I can trust you and that you’re looking out for my best interest. So those are amazing strengths. So just personally, how do you honor your introverted needs in the work that you do?

Barry Karch [00:10:33]:
Okay, good question. I do like a lot of quiet and alone time. I enjoy being out with people. I don’t want to give the wrong impression. I enjoy my clients and helping them and being with them, but when I’m done with that, I like quiet alone time. So this social distancing we’ve done the last year or so, I’ve been kind of doing that for the last ten years or so. So everyone’s coming around to my lifestyle. It’s been good. So if I have calls to make, I’ll usually bunch them together. I like to do them first thing in the morning to get them out of the way. And then once I finish off my calls, then I can sit in front of my computer in my home office and do all my work and preparation, and that’s what I’m happy. So I just get the calls out of the way, and then I have my quiet time to do my work by myself.

David Hall [00:11:25]:
Yeah, and I think we’re going to talk a little bit about some myths, too, but yeah, we absolutely like people. We need connection, and, I mean, it should be apparent to everybody. That that’s true for you. You really do care about people. But at the same time, we need some space because we need to think and we need to recharge. Some things can drain us, but we don’t want to be alone all the.

Barry Karch [00:11:50]:
Time, for sure, right? No, I enjoy being with people. I just also enjoy being by myself a lot too. My alone time to recharge. Yeah, I went to a convention recently, and I enjoyed the meetings during the day. And then after it was over, a lot of people wanted to get together and do stuff or hang out all night long, but I was ready to go back to my hotel and have some alone time to just chill and relax. And that’s what I liked.

David Hall [00:12:23]:
Yeah, I’ve been there and people don’t understand, what do you mean? You want to go back to your room? And it’s like, well, that’s what I need, but also I’m going to enjoy it.

Barry Karch [00:12:31]:
Right?

David Hall [00:12:33]:
Yeah. Okay. So again, the Quiet Strong podcast, it’s all about embracing your strengths as an introvert, honoring your needs. And we do some myth busting, and we did one already. We really do need and value connections. We like connections with people. Are there any other ones? And they could be specific to the work you do or not in real estate?

Barry Karch [00:12:55]:
Sure. There’s several myths about real estate. Number one is probably people think you have to be outgoing to be successful and enjoy being with people all the time. And you certainly don’t. You don’t have to be outgoing to be successful. Real estate is a one on one business. You just have to connect with the one person in front of you. You don’t have to be great at networking in large groups because you really don’t do that much. It’s just that one person who’s sitting right in front of you. You don’t have to be great at networking in large groups because you really don’t do that much. It’s just that one person who’s sitting right in front of you, you have to make the personal connection with. So you don’t have to be great at networking to be successful in real estate. You don’t have to be real outgoing to be successful in real estate. You just have to put your clients interests first and work for them and follow through and do what you say you’re going to do and provide them a good service. But you do not have to be an outgoing, extroverted person to be successful. Strangely enough, I was talking to one of the trainers from one of the large real estate franchises in the country, and he was telling me that the majority of his top realtors are introverts, which I knew, looking around, that a lot of good realtors are introverts, but I didn’t realize that the majority of the top ones were. And he told me yes in his franchise. And it’s one of the biggest ones in the country. He said that most of his best realtors are introverts. So it just shows you the traits for introverts do lead to success.

David Hall [00:14:30]:
Yeah. People might find that one surprising. I personally don’t, because I know what introversion really is, and so that’s a good myth to bust.

Barry Karch [00:14:38]:
Yeah. It’s not what people outside would expect. As a matter of fact, I can think of another time where another realtor was looking for an accountant, so I introduced her to the person I was using. And after he met with her, because she’s a nice, friendly, outgoing lady, he said she must be great in real estate. And, well, truth be told, she was okay. But I probably sold about four times as many homes as she did. And you wouldn’t think it whatsoever if you met the two of us on the street, you would think she would be the one that would be a bigger seller just because she was so outgoing and friendly. But I think the introverts are better at the follow through, the follow up, doing all the necessary work rather than making a bunch of connections, but not following through or not as deep of connections.

David Hall [00:15:31]:
Yeah, and you don’t need a million connections, right?

Barry Karch [00:15:35]:
No, you don’t. Just the person in front of you you just need to connect with. It’s a one on one business. That’s all real estate is.

David Hall [00:15:43]:
And again, I can tell relationships are very important to you. And I’ve also heard on your podcast that you maintain relationships for a long time. How do you do that?

Barry Karch [00:15:53]:
Okay, well, good question. What I do is usually, typically when you work with a salesperson in any industry, not just real estate, but you buy something, be it I don’t know what, a car, insurance, anything. You buy the product, and then that’s it. The transaction is over. You never hear from the salesperson again. And the salesperson also will forget you, and they’re onto the next prospect and onto the next and onto the next. For most people, it’s a transactional business. They’re just trying to do this transaction and then another transaction and transaction they forget. After you finish, they finish with you, they forget about you. But I tried to make my business a little more relational. It’s about long term relationships and not the transaction. So actually, I’ll be in touch with you more often after you close. That’s kind of when I think my relationship building really starts. So what will happen is, after you buy a house from me, most people are surprised, but they’re going to hear from me pretty regularly for years and years. Now. How does that happen? Well, I will come by your house periodically and drop off a gift for you. Unexpected surprise gift. My favorite one to do is Girl Scout cookies, because almost everybody loves Girl Scout cookies, and they’re inexpensive for me to get. And if you bought a house for me, and I just popped by one day and dropped off some Girl Scout cookies for you out of the blue. You’d probably love it, right? You’d probably be impressed.

David Hall [00:17:38]:
Yeah, those thin mints are good stuff.

Barry Karch [00:17:39]:
Exactly. That’s what I bring him by. And you’d be impressed that, hey, he still remembers me. I was important to him, and he’s still coming by, even though I bought a home for him a year ago. And so I do that consistently, year after year after year. And then I’ll give you a call periodically on the phone, just a low key, easy not a salesy call. I’ll just say, hey, David, just wanted to see how you’re enjoying your house. And that’s it. And then see what you say, what you mentioned, and just get a little conversation there. I’m not asking for any business out of you or anything else, just checking in on you. And that’s how you make people feel important, too, that you care about them. You just follow up with them occasionally, see how they’re doing, and drop off gifts. So I’ll do that for years and years and years. And I can give you a case in point right now. I have a home for sale that the people bought it for me 20 years ago, and now they have two sons in high school. They weren’t even born when they bought the house. And when I came over to list it for sale, they told their sons, hey, this is the guy that’s been bringing us the Girl Scout cookies, and so they love me right away.

David Hall [00:18:50]:
That’s awesome.

Barry Karch [00:18:51]:
Yeah. Otherwise, they would never remember me. I heard a statistic one time from someone in real estate. They said that most people, six months after they buy a house, they cannot remember the name of the realtor they bought it from or even the company they work for. So that’s how I build long term relationships and stay in touch with them just over time. And they’ll give me Lottery Pete business and referral business. And those, I found, are things, as an introvert, I could do pretty easily. These are people I already know, and they like me, and I’m just dropping off a gift to make them happy. I’m not trying to push them into anything. So that kind of played to my introvert strengths, I thought, yeah, that’s great.

David Hall [00:19:34]:
So, again, it’s very interesting to think of the top real estate agents as being introverts. And we talked about some of your strengths. I mean, how would you summarize the things that they again, everybody’s different, but what do you think are some of their strategies as introverts?

Barry Karch [00:19:51]:
Strategies for introverts realtors are being successful?

David Hall [00:19:55]:
Yeah.

Barry Karch [00:19:56]:
Okay. It’s creating that one on one relationship, just connecting with the person in front of you. We may not be good talking in groups or networking in large ballrooms, but if we’re just sitting down talking, I think introverts are pretty good at the one on one connection. And also just being yourself, not being pushy, not being aggressive, trying to help the person. Just be real, be yourself, not try to put on any phony persona, some salesperson persona, and follow through, do the research, do the necessary background work. And I think those are all the big strains.

David Hall [00:20:38]:
Okay. And we’re never bashing extroverts on this show because we need all of our different personality types, for sure. How do you think success looks different for the extroverted real estate agent?

Barry Karch [00:20:52]:
Well, I think the extroverts probably enjoy being out with people all day, constantly. I think they don’t like the alone time. So I think they’re probably very good at creating a friendly, fun relationship with their clients. There’s more than one path to the top of the mountain. You don’t have to be any one particular way to be successful. And I think maybe developing a lot of clients would probably come easier to an extrovert because they can connect with a bunch of people at once or network with a lot of people, whereas I’m more one on one. So I think generating a greater number of clients or have a better gift at talking on the phone to people or connecting with people that way, probably.

David Hall [00:21:45]:
Yeah. I love that you said that there’s more than one path, but that’s exactly what we’re talking about because a lot of times people think there is only one path, maybe the extroverted path, and that’s what we’re talking about. But at the same time, an extrovert isn’t going to be probably successful with the strategies that we’re talking about. They need to find their own way. So I love that you said that.

Barry Karch [00:22:07]:
Right. Exactly. Yeah. Everybody does things differently. And that’s one thing I’ve learned, that you can be successful doing things your own way. There’s not one way you have to do it.

David Hall [00:22:16]:
Yeah, it’s your way, right? It’s using your strengths.

Barry Karch [00:22:20]:
Exactly.

David Hall [00:22:22]:
That’s the key. And then how do you find it? Do you find it you have different strategies when you’re working with introverted clients or extroverted clients?

Barry Karch [00:22:33]:
Yeah, that’s a good question. I’ve worked with a lot of both. I work with all different kinds of people. Dealing with the public is always interesting because you meet lots of interesting and different people. I probably would work best with introverted clients because they’re going to be probably a little more analytical and we would probably connect better. But I’ve had plenty of extroverted clients, too, that I’ve worked well with. And I just think as long as you’re competent in your job, they have confidence in you that you know what you’re doing and they understand that you’re putting them in their interest first, they’re going to be happy with you, too. So do I work differently with the two of them? Probably not a great deal. I might try to be a little more talkative around an extrovert because they might be a little more gregarious type of person. So I might try to be as much talkative as I can around them, but that would be the only difference. There’s not being a great deal of difference.

David Hall [00:23:37]:
Okay. And then again, I’ve been listening to your podcast. The real estate unsalesperson. When did you create that and what are you hoping to achieve with it?

Barry Karch [00:23:48]:
Yeah, well, I created it about a year and a half ago now. And I did it when I came to realize that being an introvert was an advantage in my career. And I know a lot of people are not feeling that way or a little hesitant or unsure of themselves that they’re cut out for real estate or any other type of sales career for that matter. So I just wanted to encourage people that, yes, you can do it. You can be successful as an introvert, and you don’t have to be real salesy, real pushy to be successful. So I created it to encourage people that, yes, you can be successful in real estate by being an introvert and unsalesy. So that’s kind of where it came from and where I hope to go with it. I’m hoping to create a community of introverts and unsalesy people, too, because there’s so much in our industry, mass market advice that’s geared towards more extroverted people that may not fit our personalities as well, but there’s as we talked about other ways to be successful. So I want to gear the community and advice to things that introverts feel comfortable doing.

David Hall [00:25:05]:
Okay. Just as far as do you have any general advice for people maybe running their own business like you are as far as being an introvert?

Barry Karch [00:25:17]:
Well, I would say to be proud of who you are and realize that you have strengths that other people do not have and embrace your strengths. Introvert is not a good thing or a bad thing, nor is extrovert. It’s just a personality type, and each have their strengths and each have their weaknesses. So I would say to realize what you’re good at, you’re good at things that other people extroverts are not good at. So embrace your strengths and you can be super successful.

David Hall [00:25:48]:
Yeah, absolutely. And it’s a very natural thing. Myself, I’ve always been a deep thinker. I will be a deep thinker forever. And I don’t like the advice when people say to pretend to pretend to be an extrovert or pretend to be something you’re not. I did try that. It didn’t work very well.

Barry Karch [00:26:11]:
No, I couldn’t even try to be an extrovert.

David Hall [00:26:15]:
Okay.

Barry Karch [00:26:15]:
It’s not in my personality.

David Hall [00:26:17]:
Yeah, that’s good. And we’re in all different places. Some people always understand who they are and they’re confident about it. Some people learn that confidence as they go. And that’s part of the show is really understanding who you are, but also some strategies for success and embracing who you are, just like you were talking about.

Barry Karch [00:26:40]:
I can’t say I was always confident about it.

David Hall [00:26:43]:
Okay.

Barry Karch [00:26:43]:
It took a while because I think really extroverted people are more celebrated or more looked up to in we. Susan Kane wrote a book called Quiet, and she talks about the extrovert ideal, where I think our society encourages extroversion or an introversion is not always admired. I’ve come to appreciate it and come to be comfortable with it, but it’s been a growing process, so I don’t want to give the impression that I’ve been okay with it from day one. It was a process. It was a process to get there.

David Hall [00:27:33]:
Absolutely. And Susan Kane’s. Quiet. I own that book. It is definitely highly recommended, too, so that’s a great book. So, Barry, how did you gain confidence then? Was there anything that big moments or it was a gradual process.

Barry Karch [00:27:49]:
It was a gradual process. It wasn’t any one moment. It was just a process of working with people and people buying and selling through me. And I just found that I was able to outperform a majority of realtors. So I just gained confidence over the years that I did quite well at it. And so I just continued to be myself and do it my own way, and it worked. So it was just over time, I.

David Hall [00:28:22]:
Kind of learned, yeah, that’s awesome. And it’s kind of the same for me. It was over time, and it was realizing, like I was saying, I’m always going to be a deep thinker. And that’s a gift we were talking about. I can prepare, I can be strategic, even in relationships. I’m not in sales, but if I was, I could be very successful, but I would build relationships differently, just like you do in the work that you do, and just understanding that that, yeah, I’m who I am, and it’s good. That’s definitely been a confidence builder for me as well.

Barry Karch [00:28:59]:
Yes, it takes time getting comfortable with who you are, but I think most people go through that when they’re maturing and growing up. You have to realize who you are and what you’re good at. But then once you do, then you put your strengths into motion and you will succeed.

David Hall [00:29:16]:
Yeah. And hopefully we just help people get onto that earlier on in their process, right. Not be at the end of their career to be in the beginning or younger. So, anyway, I love the concept of the UN salesperson. That’s amazing. Is there anything else that you want to talk about that we haven’t talked about so far?

Barry Karch [00:29:39]:
Well, on the introversion, I don’t know how you feel. It took me a while to come out to just label myself as an introvert in the public, because I don’t know that that’s always perceived in a positive light. But I have come to embrace it and realize your strengths. But it took some time. Do you feel that that’s embraced positively, or were you comfortable coming out yourself as an introvert to. The public?

David Hall [00:30:15]:
Okay, that’s a great question. In fact, I talked about this in just the last podcast episode. Unfortunately, people use the term introvert many different ways, and it can definitely be misunderstood. I’ll say it’s not shyness. You can be shy if you don’t understand it, but it’s not shyness by itself. Shyness is a lack of confidence, and there’s a lot of other misperceptions. We’ve talked about some of them where you don’t like people or this or that. What I did on my last podcast is just encourage people to do a little exercise where you describe your strengths and needs without using the word introvert. Where you might talk about how you build relationships, how you prepare. For things, how you’re strategic, how you need a little break from time to time and not use the word again. I’m not ashamed of the word, but just if you only use that and don’t talk about your strengths and needs, then if somebody doesn’t understand it, they may not understand you either. There’s still a lot of miss to bust around it, but that’s one approach I take to it, is really understanding your strengths and needs and be able to articulate that to somebody.

Barry Karch [00:31:34]:
Right, I agree. And I did hear that show that you did, and it was a great show. Yes, thank you. I liked it.

David Hall [00:31:42]:
All right, well, again, this has been a great conversation. You can be successful in whatever you set out to do, whether that be real estate or something else. But I love how Barry’s figured that out, and he’s very successful in what he does, but in his introverted way. So that’s amazing.

Barry Karch [00:32:02]:
Yeah, thank you. David and I’ve found introversion to be a strength, and people can succeed in real estate or any other sales career, not despite introversion, but because of it. You have the strengths needed to be successful.

David Hall [00:32:18]:
Yeah. So where can people find more about you, Barry?

Barry Karch [00:32:23]:
Well, I have the podcast to check out. Wherever you listen to podcasts, it should be there. It’s called the real estate. UN salesperson. And if you’re in real estate, perfect. But if not, it’s not so much always specific about real estate, it’s more about mindset, so that can work for people outside of real estate also. So that’s one place to go. Or the realestateunsalesperson.com the website.

David Hall [00:32:48]:
All right, very good. Check that out, everybody. Again. Thank you, Barry. This has been a wonderful conversation.

Barry Karch [00:32:53]:
OK. Thank you, David. I enjoyed it.

David Hall [00:32:55]:
Thank you so much for joining me today. I look forward to further connecting with you. Reach out at david@quietandstrong.com. Check out the website. Quietandstrong.com. I’ll add social media channels for me and my guests to the show. Notes. Please comment on social media posts. Send me topics or guests you’d like to see on the show. There’s so many great things about being an introvert, and so we need those to be understood. Get to know your introverted strengths and needs and be stronger.

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