Ep 125 - 7 Ways to Build Confidence, Especially for Introverts

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Show Notes

Are you an introvert struggling with low self-esteem? Do you find it challenging to put yourself out there or speak up in groups? 

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this episode of The Quiet And Strong Podcast is for you! Today, host David Hall will be discussing 7 essential ways to build confidence, especially for introverts. Join David as he dives into the topic, provides actionable tips, and shares expert advice on how to increase confidence levels, embrace your authentic self, and thrive in all areas of your life. 

You’ll learn about the importance of self-awareness, the value of preparation, the power of vulnerability, and how to recharge regularly. With insights tailored to introverts, this episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to gain more confidence and unleash their full potential. 

Tune in now to boost your self-esteem and feel more empowered in your everyday life! Be confident and be strong!

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Contact the Host of the Quiet and Strong Podcast:

David Hall

Author, Speaker, Educator, Podcaster

david [at] quietandstrong.com

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Timestamped Overview

[00:02:27] Introverts aren’t lacking confidence, introversion is simply a preference for introspection. Shyness and lack of confidence are different. Introverts can gain confidence when applying success strategies appropriate for their strengths and needs. Introversion and extroversion are different, not good or bad.

[00:04:53] Strategies for introverts: Read, watch, talk deeply, reflect, prepare, and practice for situations that make you nervous. Leverage your strength in planning and preparation.

[00:08:58] Set realistic goals, break down tasks, celebrate progress, recharge regularly.

[00:10:42] Introverts value deep connections. Embrace vulnerability with trusted individuals for authentic connections and support. Utilize introvert strengths for confidence and fulfillment.

[00:13:29] Free assessment for Myers Briggs code. Embrace introverted strengths and needs.

Questions and Answers

1. What are some tips for building confidence as an introvert?

Answer: The speaker recommends setting realistic goals by breaking them down, celebrating small milestones, keeping track of accomplishments, recharging regularly, and prioritizing activities to relax. They also suggest seeking support from like-minded individuals or professionals specialized in empowering introverts.

2. How can introverts embrace their authentic selves?

Answer: The speaker emphasizes the importance of recognizing introversion as a strength and identifying and embracing one’s unique qualities and values.

3. What resources does The Quiet and Strong website offer?

Answer: The Quiet and Strong website offers blog posts, social media links, and a free personality assessment.

4. Can introverts become more confident without becoming extroverted?

Answer: Yes, building confidence as an introvert does not require changing who you are or becoming an extrovert.

5. What is the importance of changing one’s thoughts before and after a new experience?

Answer: Changing one’s thoughts from negative to positive can help build confidence before and during an experience, while reflecting positively afterward can reinforce confidence.

6. What are some small steps introverts can take to expand their comfort zone and build confidence?

Answer: Joining a book club, attending a workshop, or volunteering for a cause are small steps that can help expand an introvert’s comfort zone.

7. How can introverts prepare for situations that make them nervous, such as presentations or meetings?

Answer: The speaker recommends leveraging introverts’ strengths in planning and preparation.

8. What is the importance of solitude for introverts?

Answer: Solitude can help introverts focus, think, plan, and prepare, enhancing their well-being and performance.

9. How can vulnerability help build confidence for introverts?

Answer: Sharing thoughts and feelings with trusted individuals can create opportunities for authentic connections and support, boosting confidence and demonstrating vulnerability as strength.

10. What is the relationship between introversion and confidence?

Answer: Introversion is not inherently lacking in confidence, and introverts can gain confidence and overcome shyness by understanding and utilizing their strengths and needs. Success strategies for introverts may look different from those of extroverts.

Podcast Transcript

David Hall [00:00:08]:

Hello. And welcome to episode 125 of the Quiet Strong Podcast, especially for introverts. I’m your host, David Hall, and the creator of quietestrunk.com. This is a weekly podcast dedicated to understanding the strengths and needs of introverts. Intraversion is not something to fix, but to be embraced. Normally, while they’re each episode on a Monday, be sure to subscribe on your favorite platform. Leave a review. That would mean a lot to me.

David Hall [00:00:33]:

Tell a friend about the podcast and help get the word out there. The introversion is a beautiful thing. So this past week, I made a short video for work. It’s just a few minutes long, so I prepared the script. The words needed to be fairly exact, so I used the teleprompter. I did have to do a few takes, but in the end, it turned out well. I wasn’t nervous about doing it, but I didn’t need to put in the time to practice and also tweak the wording. So as I spoke the words that came out naturally, Being confident and not nervous was not the norm for me a few years ago.

David Hall [00:01:07]:

In my early days, if I was asked to do something like this, I’m so nervous. My voice would shake. My knees would shake. My throat would be dry, and it would not be a fun experience. What changed? I’ve got to know myself, my introverted nature, my strengths, my needs. And I do wanna say, not all introverts lack confidence. But when you don’t know your gifts and strengths as a introvert, that can lead to a lack of confidence. So would you be confident making a video for work or for your business or some other type of public performance? If not, this could be changed, and you can gain confidence.

David Hall [00:01:48]:

Had a few conversations around the video, there was a general lack of confidence about doing something like that. I spoke to both introverts and extroverts. Why is this? Confidence is something that everyone can benefit from regardless of their personality type and everyone can gain confidence. However, the approach to gaining confidence is different for introverts and extroverts in many ways. We, of course, will focus on introverts in this episode. If you happen to be an extrovert listening, welcome. There may be many things that apply to everyone. Of course, you may learn a bit more about introverts in your life.

David Hall [00:02:27]:

Before we explore the ways introverts can gain confidence, let’s first dispel the myth that introverts are inherently lacking in confidence. In reality, introversion is simply a preference for introspection and deep thought with the need for some solitude. Intro version doesn’t mean shyness as shyness is a lack of confidence. and it doesn’t mean that introverts are any less capable or confident than their extroverted counterparts. Introverts that are shy and lack confidence can absolutely gain confidence and overcome shyness. In order to be confident, an introvert needs to understand how to approach life with their introverted strengths and needs and employ success strategies. And these success strategies may look different from their extroverted colleagues. Introversion and extraversion are not good or bad, just different.

David Hall [00:03:20]:

So now let’s jump into the strategies that can help introverts build their confidence they don’t have it already. So first, self awareness is the foundation of confidence. Introverts excel and self reflection So take advantage of that strength. Spend time understanding your strengths, your weaknesses, your values, your passions. recognize your accomplishments and acknowledge the unique strengths that make you who you are. Embrace your introversion as a source of strength rather than a limitation. Back on episode 89, present storytelling and public speaking with Richard Newman, I asked Richard, how do introverts gain confidence? And, of course, Richard is a fellow introvert, and he’s taught communication skills Worldwide is reply. 1st of all, know that you are 1.

David Hall [00:04:14]:

And second, that’s okay. I just love that response, and it really stuck with me. So who are you? Again, we are introspective, so take advantage of this strength. There are many great resources that we discuss on this podcast. So listening to this podcast can be very helpful in your journey as we talk about. assessments like the Myers Briggs or Gallup strengths and and many more. There’s many great books out there, and we have authors like Doctor Laurie Hago or Jen Granamen on to discuss their books and their work. We have different coaches on to discuss strategies for success and building confidence.

David Hall [00:04:53]:

Keep reading, keep listening, keep watching videos, have conversations with others, especially the deep conversations that we love, and reflect on those gifts that you want to bring into the world and also what you need to do to succeed. And then what Richard Newman said next leads into the next important strategy for introverts. He said preparation for me is also liberation. I don’t use preparation to handcuff myself such that I have to do things exactly that way, but it becomes liberating because I’m so confident that I know where I’m heading and why I’m heading there, and I’ve really had that time to prepare my thoughts to the best of my ability. So preparation and practice is key for introverts. Introverts often excel with planning and preparation We have brilliant ideas because we are deep thinkers, but we often need to give ourselves time and space to let those ideas develop. Leverage the strength of planning and preparation when it comes to situations where you lack confidence or that make you nervous. If you have a presentation or meeting coming up, spend extra time preparing and rehearsing.

David Hall [00:06:06]:

Practice speaking up in smaller group settings before tackling larger audiences. The more you practice, the more confident you’ll become. So back to the video, I wrote my video script, and then let it sit. like, you know, stepped away. And then I went back to review it and make some more tweaks to it. I then started reading it out loud and see how the wording sounded coming out of my mouth and made some further tweaks. But also this reading out loud helped the words flow naturally and helped me speak more naturally and not just reading from a script when the time came to record. Also, the work you and I do will likely not be scripted.

David Hall [00:06:47]:

In general, I usually have an outline for speeches or presentations, but not an exact script. but still as an introvert, it helps to think ahead of what you want to say in general. So the third tip is to practice gradual exposure. Confidence is not built overnight. Start by expanding your comfort zone. in small steps, engage in social activities that align with your interests, whether that’s joining a book club attending a workshop or volunteering for a cause you care about. Look for opportunities to present or to make a video. By gradually exposing yourself to new experiences, you’ll expand your comfort zone and grow more confident over time.

David Hall [00:07:35]:

So I call it expanding or changing your comfort zone because it’s not just about getting out of your comfort zone. It’s likely If you’ve lacked confidence or have felt shy in the past, you’ve been getting out of your comfort zone all of your life. But it’s changing your comfort zone by exposure, know, having new experiences and gradually building up to bigger experiences. And then the important thing is changing your thoughts before and after the experience. In the case of making the video, I could say things like I have important things to say, I have prepared and practiced, and there is nothing to be nervous about. I got this. And then afterward, say, hey. That was good.

David Hall [00:08:20]:

You did a great job. And, of course, we are always learning and growing, so reflect on what went well and think about what you will do differently next time. But again, if you only get out of your comfort zone and you don’t change your thoughts, You’re gonna have to keep getting out of your comfort zone. Over and over and over again. But if you have the new experience, You tell yourself positive things, and you do prepare. You you know, you do the work, then you now become comfortable with new situations over time. And you don’t have to keep getting out of your comfort zone, but you’ve expanded it. You’ve changed it.

David Hall [00:08:58]:

The 4th tip is set realistic goals. Setting achievable goals is crucial for building confidence, break down larger goals into smaller manageable tasks, By focusing on bite sized objectives, you’ll experience a sense of accomplishment along the way. Can celebrate each milestone no matter how small and use those victories to fuel your confidence for future endeavors. And a tip is keep track of your accomplishments and then remind yourself of the progress you’ve made when you need to. And reflecting on past successes can reignite your belief and serve as a powerful reminder of your capabilities. Number 5, recharge regularly and take care of yourself. Introverts draw their energy from within and need ample long time to recharge. The prioritize activities that allow you to relax whether it’s reading a book going for a walk in nature, practicing mindfulness, make sure to allocate time for yourself.

David Hall [00:09:58]:

Taking care of your well-being will enhance your overall confidence and resilience. So in the case of the video, I took some time before to get into the right mindset. And then when it was done, might schedule some time after to recharge. It’s a myth that introverts wanna be alone all the time, but it is true that we do need some time alone for recharge, for focusing thinking, planning and preparing. And I’ve learned that some solitude for me is not a luxury, but a necessity. Let people in your life know when you need some time to recharge or do your best work. And it’s not personal, but that’s how you operate best. The 6th thing, embrace vulnerability.

David Hall [00:10:42]:

Introverts tend to value deep connections and meaningful conversations. embrace vulnerability by opening up and sharing your thoughts, fears, aspirations with trusted individuals So this isn’t being vulnerable with just everyone, but it could be so powerful with that friend that gets you and wants you to succeed to share these things. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable, you create opportunities for authentic conversations and connections and receive support and encouragement which can significantly boost your confidence. Remember, vulnerabilities of strength not a weakness by embracing vulnerability and opening up to trusted individuals you can create an environment that nurtures authentic connection support and encouragement. And the 7th thing, utilize your strengths. Introverts possess unique strengths such as creativity, observation skills, analytical thinking, reflection, focus, concentration, and many, many more gifts. Find ways to leverage your strengths in different aspects of your life. Engaging activities that align with your natural inclinations Whether it’s writing, painting, problem solving, strategic thinking, harnessing your strengths will not only build confidence but also bring a sense of fulfillment.

David Hall [00:11:59]:

Remember, these are just a few examples of strengths that introverts may possess. Each individual has their unique set of strengths. and it’s important to identify and embrace them. By utilizing your strengths in different aspects of your life, you can not only build confidence but also find great fulfillment and success in your pursuits. Remember, building confidence is a personal journey and everyone’s path will be different. Embrace your introverted nature and leverage your unique strength as you navigate this process. seek support from like minded individuals or consider working with a coach or therapist who specializes in empowering introverts. confidence is not about becoming an extrovert or changing who you are as an introvert.

David Hall [00:12:44]:

It’s about embracing your authentic self and recognizing your own worth By implementing these strategies and embracing your introversion, you’ll unleash your inner confidence and thrive in all areas of your life. Remember, you have unique qualities that the world needs, and your introversion is a strength and not a weakness. Thank you so much for joining me. I look forward to further connecting with you. Reach out at david@clientstrunk.com. or check out the quiet and strong dot com website, which includes blog posts, links to social media, and other items. Send me topics or guests you would like to see on the show. If you’re interested in getting to know yourself better, there’s now a free type finder personality assessment on the Quiet and Strong website.

David Hall [00:13:29]:

This free assessment will give you a brief report including the 4 letter Myers Briggs code. I’ll add a link to the show notes. There’s so many great things about being an introvert, so we need those to be understood. Get to know your introverted strengths and needs and be strong.

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